Deconstructing Ryan Lochte
Team USA's most frat-ified medalist is a walking game of Boff/Marry/Kill, likely to inspire a level of heated love-or-hate-him debate unseen since Obamacare. Just when we were ready to let go until 2016, turns out he's doing a Funny or Die clip with Simon Pegg. Fine, we're still watching you, bro.
Fast food as political statement
However you may feel about Chik-Fil-A or gay marriage, you've got to admit: Seeing a fried chicken chain occupy the center of American social discourse is like something out of a long-lost South Park episode. Apparently CNN is already scouting mall food courts to host this fall's presidential debates.
Dudes, Marrrrssss!
After two solid weeks of Olympic drama, we thought we'd gotten all that patriotic crying-at-the-TV out of our system. Then NASA puts a rover on the surface of freaking Mars and it's like, Gabby who?! Chalk up another one for the geeks, big time.
Giving The Newsroom one last chance
C'mon, Sorkin. Leave the sanctimony to the campaign trail and give us the same level of truth-telling that Will McAvoy and his team promised their viewers. (Also, don't look now but your recycled West Wing plots are showing.)
Jessica Biel's lips in Total Recall
They're unstoppable in any setting, but damn. Any mug that can upstage an ass-kicking Kate Beckinsale is worthy of its own metaphysical sci-fi exploration.
The Ruby Sparks soundtrack
The Little Miss Sunshine score already had us pretty crushed out on DeVotchka front man Nick Urata. Then we put his lush compositions for Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris' follow-up movie on repeat, and it's full-on starry-eyed hosannah territory over here. Crazy beautiful.
Love & Hip-Hop: Atlanta
Between Karlie and Joseline's tense negotiations and the almost-grotesque spectacle of Shay loving on Scrappy, this is the stuff reality-TV dreams are made of.
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