Good: Olivier Giroud
Oh la la, Olivier! As if this French soccer stud weren't gorgeous enough already, he's got a killer slicked-back ‘do.
Bad: Neymar da Silva
We get it—he's a steamy Brazilian sensation. But its 2014, not 2004, meaning he can't get away with a platinum blond dye-job anymore.
Inexplicable: Die Serey
There is no excuse for a platinum mohawk.
Good: Robin van Persie
The Netherlands has been crushing it at the World Cup, and this Dutch hottie is doing just the same in the realm of athletic haircuts.
Bad: Keisuke Honda
Again with the platinum blond… just no.
Inexplicable: Danijel Pranjic
Maybe the Croatian defender was going for a Sonic the Hedgehog look?
Good: Benoit Assou-Ekotto
A look like this takes loads of time and dedication to maintain—which is hard enough for the average Joe, let alone a professional athlete. Props to you, Benoit!
Bad: Saphir Taider
Saphir is hot even with the funky mohawk trend, so just imagine him without. Whew!
Inexplicable: Kyle Beckerman
It's not that dreads aren't our thing. It's that after all the hot sweaty soccer games, those long locks have got to be stanky.
Good: Mats Hummels
We're not sure which is better—that knees-go-weak smolder or the flawless hair.
Bad: Mattia Perin
With the right trim, this look wouldn't be so bad.
Inexplicable: Asamoah Gyan
Lucky jersey numbers we get, but shaving and dyeing said number into your head? Overkill.
Good: Jordan Henderson
This English footballer is clearly David Beckham's protégé in terms of perfect on-field hair.
Bad: Anthony Vanden Borre
The Belgian defender looks like a peculiar rendition of a Wooly Willy toy. Remember those?
Inexplicable: Raul Meireles
Hopefully this "playoff beard" won't last beyond the World Cup.