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The Definitive Ranking of All the New Fall Shows—From Crazy Bad to Crazy Awesome!

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Sep 12, 2014 6:08 PM
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The Mysteries of Laura
1/22
Barbara Nitke/NBC

22. The Mysteries of Laura

"Oh, Debra Messing. You are so fantastic, but we need to talk about some of your choices."—Kristin

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2/22
ABC/Craig Sjodin

21. Manhattan Love Story

"Listen, if I wanted to hear the inner-ramblings of a self-absorbed twenty-something going out with the dregs of the dating world, I'd just pay more attention to my thoughts when I am out on a date. Swiping this show to the left so hard and fast I'm nervous it might try and sue me. (Also: New York City deserves better. Like The Mindy Project filming there instead.)"—Tierney

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3/22
Matthias Clamer/FOX

20. Mulaney

"I really like John Mulaney's standup. His show? Not at all. I get it. I get what they're trying to do here, but just no. Sorry. No."—Chris

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4/22
Sonja Flemming/CBS

19. The McCarthys

"Honesty, there aren't enough words to describe how much I disliked this pilot. The cast is lovely, Jason Ritter's brother Tyler Ritter is a star, and Joey McIntyre is surprisingly good! But the jokes are awkward, stereotypical and predictable, the multi-cam setup feels archaic (did I just change the channel to 1982?), and I quite honestly cringed the whole way through. FREE TYLER."—Kristin

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5/22
ABC/Patrick Harbron

18. Forever

"It's traditional procedural flair with a genre twist. Nothing too spectacular to see here."—Chris

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6/22
John Fleenor/NBC

17. Bad Judge

"Instead of watching Bad Judge, let's all just watch reruns of Kate Walsh's amazing role of Addison Montgomery on Grey's Anatomy/Private Practice. Your time will be much better spent that way, I promise."—Sydney

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7/22
ABC

16. Cristela

"I really wanted to like this pilot. Executive producer Cristela Alonzo charmed the socks off me during her panel at the summer TV Press Tour, opening up about how far she's come in her life and all the obstacles she's overcome. But unfortunately, as much as I want her to succeed and achieve all her dreams, I just cannot get behind this pilot. It's as obvious and unoriginal as possible. The characters are one-dimensional and the situations are been-there-done-that. I don't see this pilot succeeding, and it breaks my heart."—Sydney

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8/22
CBS

15. Scorpion

"Katharine McPhee is me. I am Katherine McPhee. As in I did not understand or know half of the techy things said in this pilot, but I still enjoyed it. Alas, it'll probably become one of my weekend "Oh crap, I forgot this was still on here" catchup shows. And I feel like this must be stated: Team Karen 4eva! (I will always love you, Smash.)"—Tierney

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9/22
ABC/Adam Taylor

14. black-ish

"Will black-ish break the post-Modern Family slump ABC has been in? Quite possibly. However, I'm drawn to the more off-beat comedies (see: Selfie) so black-ish will probably be occasional viewing."—Chris

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10/22
Michael Parmelee/NBC

13. State of Affairs

"The first episode has a truly great (dare I say Shonda-esque?) twist. And while I'm not sure this will be appointment viewing for me, I'm also not ready to jump on the Heigl-hating bandwagon. I'll watch more."—Kristin

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11/22
Tyler Golden/The CW

12. Jane the Virgin

"The biggest surprise of the Fall TV season! I expected to haaaaaaate this series, just based on the insanely ludicrous premise. (Don't you just hate it when your doctor accidentally inseminates you? Dumb. Dumb. Dumb!) But Jane has so much charm, and the girl who plays her, Gina Rodriguez, is so darn loveable (and badass), I can't help but root for this show. (And it's going to need a lot of help, since it has the worst timeslot ever, up against The Voice and Dancing With the Stars…Ugh…)"—Kristin

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12/22
David M. Russell/CBS

11. Madam Secretary

"A solid premise that may seem a bit familiar—yes, I'm talking to you, the few people who also watched all of Political Animals—I really wanted to be behind Madam Secretary from the start, but there's just something that hasn't quite jelled fully in the pilot. The spark is there, but just needs to be ignited."—Chris

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13/22
Quantrell Colbert/NBC

10. Constantine

"Let me see if I can put into words just how much I love this new show...I. AM. ABSOLUTELY. OBSESSED. Now, that doesn't mean that I'm going to actually stay home Friday nights to watch it live, but I'm setting my DVR season pass now and will watch it when I wake up every Saturday morning. I love anything having to do with angels, demons, and their battle for control over humanity, and Matt Ryan is so swoon-worthy as the troubled, doomed-soul-searching-for-redemption Constantine."—Sydney

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14/22
CBS

9. Stalker

"Excuse me while I never sleep with the lights off again. (Sorry roommates, our electric bill is going up!) But seriously, Stalker was downright chilling…in a good way. And Maggie Q once again proves why she's the most badass (and underrated) woman on TV."—Tierney

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15/22
Colleen Hayes/NBC

8. Marry Me

From the people who brought you Happy Endings and Penny Hartz, -one of the (soon to be) classic TV characters, Marry Me is everything you want it to be. Mix in a healthy dose of Party Down's Ken Marino, some quality comedy misunderstandings and you have the funny pilot for this NBC comedy. Get ready to make some GIFs!"—Chris

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16/22
FOX

7. Gotham

"I think I've found my new favorite show (and not just my new favorite new show). From the inability to pinpoint exactly what time period it's set in (old-timey cars and clothes…and modern cell phones?), to the amazingly-perfect casting (Robin Lord Taylor, you were born to play the Penguin), to the fact that Ryan Atwood is back on my TV screen (yes, he will always be known as Chino to me), this. Just. Works!"—Sydney

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17/22
FOX

6. Gracepoint

"I already watched and adored the original UK version of this show, Broadchurch, so I have to admit: I DON'T GET IT. (Sorry for shouting, but I have EMOTIONS about this one.) Why would I watch the same show, scene for scene, shot by shot, for a few episodes (with different actors), and then watch the writers tinker the storyline, just to try to make it different, so they can make money in the U.S.? The first series was perfect. Why not just air Broadchurch here? Doing a skewed new version of it feels like blasphemy and I just can't get past it. Apparently I'm a card-carrying Broadchurch purist! AHEM. All that said, 99.9 percent of you have never seen the original series and for you, GRACEPOINT IS PROBABLY THE BEST NEW DRAMA THIS FALL. Sorry for burying that lead. I'm just working through some issues here, guys. And I'm so jealous of all of you who haven't seen the original yet! I hope you enjoy the ride."—Kristin

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18/22
ABC

5. Selfie

"Love. So much love for the Selfie pilot. Even a cringe-inducing vomit scene. It's easy to fall for new comedies based on a strong pilot—we've all done it and either had our hearts broken by a network or the show when its quality dipped!—and I've fallen for the charismatic duo of Karen Gillan and John Cho. Don't be jelly, other new shows."—Chris

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19/22
Jack Rowand

4. The Flash

"With so many comic book shows on TV this Fall, if you only pick one, this is the one to watch. Finally we have a superhero with no doubts about being a superhero. It's such a breath of fresh air watching Barry Allen take delight in his new powers and his new responsibilities instead of navel-gazing and brooding. (Not that I don't love a brooding superhero, because, oh, how I love me some brooding heroes, but it's nice to finally see one that isn't tied down with so many dark secrets!)"—Sydney

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20/22
Trae Patton/NBC

3. A to Z

"Love, love, love. Did I mention LOVE? By far my favorite new comedy of the year, I am totally ready to DTR with this unabashed and unapologetic romantic comedy. I know, I know, I should play hard to get, but Ben Feldman and Cristin Milioti are just impossible to resist. As they say in Sleepless in Seattle, it's like…magic. And A to Z wins best random celeb cameo of the fall TV season. (Oh, just wait, Back to the Future fans. Just wait.)"—Tierney

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21/22
FOX

2. Red Band Society

"Oh, how I just want to hug this show and never let it go. My favorite pilot of the year, it's The Breakfast Club meets Glee meets The Fault in Our Stars, but still manages to feel completely fresh. I dare you not to smile your way through this one. It's physically impossible (and possibly illegal)."—Tierney

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22/22
ABC/Craig Sjodin

1. How to Get Away With Murder

"There is only one real down side to HTGAWM. No, on second thought, make that two. 1) We are going to have to write a lot about this show because you are going to be obsessed, and it has the longest name ever with the worst acronym in TV history. 2) It's so good, you'll question how much you love Scandal. Yes, THAT GOOD!"—Kristin

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PHOTOS: Fall TV spoiler-rama


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