Season Three
"When I'm with Brittany I finally understand what people are talking about when they talk about love."—Santana
Season Three
"Thanks for the offer but I'd rather raw dog a beehive."—Puck
Season Three
"I haven't been this worried about a vote since Lambert versus Allen."—Rachel
Season Three
It wasn't until I got to kindergarten that I learned my name wasn't GarbageFace."—Santana
Season Three
"Winning is really about poo-slinging."—Sue
Season Three
"It was like being smothered by a sweaty, out of breath sack of potatoes that somebody soaked in body spray."—Santana describing sex with Finn
Season Three
"I don't know who this Blaine guy is, but I hear he's sex on a stick and sings like a dream."—Sebastian
Season Three
"I hope that my radiance isn't too much for you."—Rachel
Season Three
"You take my breath away."—Kurt to Blaine
Season Three
"Every time he opens his dreamboat acapella mouth, you're just itching to kick him right in the warblers."—Santana to Finn
Season Three
"I am literally horny with fear."—Sue
Season Three
"Beth is perfect, she is my perfect thing. Something I can't even screw up. Do you know how hard it is to accomplish something perfectly? I'll never get the chance again. So even if I never leave this town or accomplish anything, I'll have her to call mine."—Quinn
"Here's the deal, pixie-boy. You've got a crush on my girl, Brittany. I understand. She's beautiful, she's innocent, she's everything that's good in this miserable, stinking world."—Santana
Season Three
"Yeah, Kurt looks like Jimmy Fallon's butch daughter, but a vote for him would only empower yet another frank and beans." –Santana
Season Three
"It's always been the Rachel Berry Show around here, but it's not gonna be for me."—Mercede
Season Three
"Oh, so you're cool with flushing McKinley High's future down the magical, poop-stealing water chair?" –Brittany to Kurt
Season Three
"When a pony does a good deed, he gets a horn and he becomes a unicorn. And then he poops out cotton candy until he forgets he's magical. And then his horn falls off. And black unicorns, they become zebras."—Brittany
Season Three
"You're the best girlfriend ever."—Finn to Rachel
Season Three
"I've put plastic on your chair, so feel free to wet yourself with excitement."—Sue
Season Three
"You have one move, Kurt. It's like this sashay and it's super distracting." —Mike
Season Three
"Dude, you're gay. And you're not like Rock Hudson gay, you're really gay. You sing like Diana Ross and you dress like you own a magic chocolate factory."—Burt to Kurt
Season Two
"You have to know that I'm leaving, Finn. I'm going to New York and I'm never coming back."—Rachel
Season Two
"Do you want to know what happens in Vocal Adrenaline if someone dies during a number? They use them as a prop. Like Weekend at Bernie's."—Jesse
Season Two
"I love you Santana. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone else in this world. All I know about you and I is that because of that, I think anything's possible."—Brittany