The Bachelorette
Aren't we all looking for love? Maybe that's why we continue to tune in to watch guys fight over the chance to be famous for a hot minute find their one and only. We're such saps.
Bridezillas
Because every girl dreams of this day: fighting with the florists, meltdowns over accessories and brides so bitchy it's hard to believe they actually found someone who could put up with them for life.
Wipeout
Hmm. People falling down a lot. People getting hit by things. Annnnnd record.
Real Housewives
As real as it gets. We guess. We're still waiting for Real Housewives of Quiet Chicago Suburb: Nobody Has Weaves.
Millionaire Matchmaker
Money can't buy you love. Unless you are indeed a millionaire and you can hire the services of Patti Stanger. We love how bitchy she is, and it looks hella good for your business when you finally find yourself a man and a huge ring to go with it.
Little Miss Perfect
Ah, the joys of watching mothers live vicariously through respectfully cherish their little girls by making them prance around in bedazzled head pieces and cowboy boots. We're still not sure who cries more during the episodes: mother or daughter.
Jersey Shore
Grenade. Fist-pumping. Guidette. Hippo. GTL. And you thought this show taught the world nothing!
16 and Pregnant
Worried about your kids and their safe sex habits? Sit down with them and flip on an episode of 16 and Pregnant. It is the best contraceptive ever! Especially after they see that the girls, like, totally can't go party because they have to, ew, change diapers.
The Hills
"All my favorite memories are memories with you!" Oh, don't act like you didn't cry! The final season is upon us, which means more tears are guaranteed. Except for she-who-cannot-be-named, as her tear ducts now only produce puffs of hot air pumped right from her head.
Get a look at the new shows we'll be watching this fall!

