Season Three
"Most people don't realize I lost 10 pounds during that performance."—Jesse on performing "Bohemian Rhapsody"
Season Three
"I'm not totally gay, but I think that trees are born the same way as babies, so kicking me out would be kind of mean."—Brittany
Season Three
"Keep rocking that mullet Ricky. Maybe in 10 years it'll come back in style."—Puck
Season Three
"Mr. Shue, when I met you I was just an annoying Jewish girl with two gay dads and a very big dream. Today, I still have two dads, and I'm still Jewish, and I'm probably just as annoying."—Rachel
Season Three
"I always go to the yelling place. I have rage."—Santana
Season Three
"Puckerman, I respect your commitment to winning, but without a doubt you are the ugliest woman I have ever seen. For a second there, I thought you were Beiste's sister."—Sue
Season Three
"William, I can taste your Axe body spray."—Sue
Season Three
"You dance like you've got your feet caught in bear traps, and you're trying to gnaw them off."—Puck to Sam
Season Three
"I vowed not to speak with you unless William and Kate got pregnant, Liza passed, or unless one of us was in grave danger."—Rachel to Kurt
Season Three
"I spent the weekend sending your photo to ivory poachers who could make an absolute fortune selling your enormous white teeth on the black market."—Sue to Roz
Season Three
Teacher: "Noah, why are you closing the door?"
Puck: "So the chemistry doesn't get out."
Season Three
"Quinn, you're still dancing in my dreams. And you can fly and breathe fire."—Brittany
Season Three
"You've stuck by me, forgiven me for sleeping with your women. Not everyone in my life has done that. One cougar's husband even chased me around with a gun."—Puck to his bros
Season Three
"Finn sends me cutesy text messages all the time. Usually they're puns about my boobs, but I still appreciate the effort."—Rachel
Season Three
"You just need to start storing your poops in the trunk."–Brittany to Santana
Season Three
"I have no idea who Porcelain is refering to. I'm assuming it's gay and niche."—Sue
Season Three
"I'm sorry, are you talking to me right now? Because I can't tell if you are talking to me if you don't point your finger."–Cooper
Season Three
"It's springtime. I would like to see something give birth."—Brittany
Season Three
"It also wouldn't kill you to stop letting Kurt pick out your clothes."—Cooper to Blaine
Season Three
"Blaine, your brother is the best looking man in North America."–Kurt
Season Three
"I want Lord Tubbington to kick his ecstasy addiction."—Brittany
Season Three
"When you were singing that song, you were singing it to Finn and only Finn, right? He really does make you so happy. I want to support you, Rachel, and Finn, and come to the wedding. If it's not too late."—Quinn to Rachel
Season Three
Sebastian: "You give the gay community cutting-edge fashions usually only seen on Puerto-Rican Pride floats.
Kurt: "I'm sorry, I can't hear you over your giant horse teeth."
Season Three
"But you're gonna get through this. Cause I'm gonna help you. And so is everyone else who loves you and accepts you for who you are. And if they can't accept that then, screw them. Right?"—Kurt to Dave