51. Amanda Bynes' DUI Drama
It took a year, but we finally got a suitable replacement for Law & Order: L.A.: an ex-Nickelodeon starlet who tries to hire President Obama as her defense team via Twitter. DUIs are no joke, but we plead guilty to loving this.
50. Joseph Gordon-Levitt
Shia La Who? This former Third Rock imp's stock is rising at a scary rate. He was flat-out amazing in last year's cancer drama 50/50; this year he's set to thrill The Dark Knight Rises and Steven Spielberg's Lincoln.
49. Chuck Norris
Here's a Chuck Norris fact: You don't have to agree with his super-conservative views to think it's fitting that he writes op-eds for ammunition magazines. (What, is Judo Weekly too liberal?) Anyway, Expendables 2. Gonna be awesome.
48. Questlove, King of Twitter
Not only is the Roots' drummer the bossest beat keeper on late-night TV, the cooly coiffed musical mastermind is also the force behind one of the most engaging Twitter feeds in the interwebs—funny, wide-ranging and totally, totally cool.
47. Anne Hathaway's Amazing, Crying Face in the Les Mis Trailer
Just...wow. Something tells us we'll be making the same face—in the best possible way—when this thing comes out in December.
46. Kimye
Modern-day Liz Taylor and Richard Burton or elaborate media experiment to test the limits of the human ego? We care not for such hair-splitting. More birthday Lamborghini pics, please.
45. Jeremy Renner, Action Hero
Whether he's defying gravity in Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol, flexing superhero skills in The Avengers or zigzagging a motorcycle through crowded streets in The Bourne Legacy, he's making us all very dizzy—in more ways than one.
44. Anything Rihanna
You know you're hot when even crappy Draw Something portraits of you are driving massive Web traffic. Singing, not singing, partying, whatever—sign us up.
43. Jack White's Insomnia
So what if, as he puts it, a White Stripes reunion "could never happen?" Johnny Depp's rock-star doppelganger fills every waking moment with an awesome new project, from weirdo collaborations with Stephen Colbert and Insane Clown Posse to rumored production gigs with Radiohead and the Rolling Stones. He'll sleep when he's dead, which had better not happen anytime soon.
42. Julia Louis-Dreyfus All Over Again
Even if her wildly acidic and undeniably awesome role as Vice President Selena Meyer on HBO's Veep doesn't squash that Seinfeld Curse nonsense for good, we're savoring every Emmy-worthy minute.
41. Sasha & Malia
Michelle Obama isn't the only righteous female on Pennsylvania Avenue. Now 11 and (going on) 14, the first daughters have been making waves not only for their increasingly chic fashion choices, but also for urging their mom to go on shows like iCarly as part of her battle against childhood obesity.
40. Gotye
If Adele's "Someone Like You" is Gwyneth Paltrow (eternally classy, suitable for the office), this Belgian-Australian singer's "Somebody That I Used to Know" is Kristen Stewart—deliciously jaded and irresistibly cool. We're responsible for roughly half of those 264 million YouTube views.
39. Jimmy Fallon
Just because we were loyal members of Team Coco doesn't mean we don't know a blossoming late-night maestro when we see one. The affable SNL grad has officially giggled, slow-jammed and beer-ponged his way into our insomniac hearts.
38. Francis Bean
Shouldering the burdens of a dad who's a deceased rock legend and a mom who makes Real Housewives actually look real, FB carries herself with more rugged Hollywood moxie than any of her celeb-progeny peers.
37. Food Trucks
In 2012, all it takes to be a hot restaurateur is four wheels and a Twitter account. With more delicious eat-mobiles popping up across the nation every day, the only downside to this gourmand food-truck boom is the millions of out-of-work tablecloths.
36. Abby Lee Miller's Voice on Dance Moms
Her rasp rivals Rachael Ray's, striking terror into the hearts of young steppers and stage moms alike. We're not sure what she's smoking, but we pray she never quits.
35. Fake Celeb Twitter Feeds
Why pretend to care what the real Alec Baldwin thinks about politics when you can enjoy @NotTildaSwinton tweeting about small fruit-bearing branches emerging from her face?
34. Workaholics
This amazing cross between It's Always Sunny and "bros icing bros" satisfies our desire to believe there's more to that dude in the next cubicle than a desperate need to get high on his lunch hour.
33. Ellen Page, Gamer Goddess
And you thought the Juno star had run out of ways to boost her pop-culture cool quotient. As the voice of Jodie Holmes, badass heroine of the forthcoming video game Beyond: Two Souls, Page will soon have Academy members ditching their DVD screeners for PS3 controllers.
32. Jessica Chastain
Compared with the seven films she starred in last year, this summer's double-dip of Madagascar 3 and Lawless might make it seem like she's coasting. But make no mistake: This here's the new Meryl Streep.
31. Chris Hemsworth's Hair
Like Alec Baldwin's character on 30 Rock, we suspect stylists actually pay for the privilege to cut the Thor star's supernatural locks. Even when the bangs skew a little Bon Jovi, the stuff is money.
30. Instagram
Bought by Facebook for, as Dr. Evil would say, "one bil-lion dollars," the hipster photo-sharing service has singlehandedly validated iPhone-wielding millennials everywhere.
29. Bill Hader
There's a reason why the departures of Kristin Wiig and Andy Samberg from SNL don't worry us in the least. Hader was already one of the show's most fearless and versatile talents, and he'll stand out even more when he starts his eighth season this fall. Viva Stefon!
28. Fifty Shades of Grey
Racy, S&M-filled Twilight fan fiction goes beyond viral and puts some welcome bite back into many a married couple's bedroom. Is it any wonder über-sexpot Angelina Jolie wants to direct the movie?