Markie's Pants
Slow pants day.
Chuck Norris
No.
Full Screen Title
Iowa looks unstoppable with their 25 character defense.
Took Picture
He was being interviewed about a smoking ban on campus, but they thought that was relevant information.
Chicken Reporting
Holding a chicken: Still a bad idea. More at 11.
Main Burst
"The building looks like a penis? OK, let's get an aerial shot."
Have a Nice Trip
"Thank you for that thrilling report on tripping like an idiot on live television, David."
World War 11
Sure, this may look like a typo, but have you even considered that he may really be from the 11th World War where they have TIME TRAVEL?!
McNuggets
That's McSex for McNuggets, thank you very much.
PB&J
If you segregate your peanut butter and jelly in the cabinet then yeah they are.
Suspicious Flashlight
Is it because it's black?
Two Easy
"Up next: tying shoes is still hard. Nation wishes its mom would buy them velcro sneakers."
Hungry Bear
That bear was hungry alright, bone hungry.
Chance of What?
Well, at least there will be sunshine tomorrow.
Wesley Snipes
Writing "Wesley Snipes" is really bad because we know which other wrong actor you were trying to think of.
Killed to Death
"The other victim was killed to critical condition."
Wedgie-Proof
The only people who need said invention are these two kids.
Have a Great Fire
"Unless this is your house. If it is, try to have a great day, for me, ok?"
Jury Duty
Just tell them you hate dogs during the interview.
Seized
"Suspect claims life is no longer worth living."
Many Words
This is quite the situation developing at Parked Cop Car Road.
Rocket + Sled
My calculations claim Rocket + Sled = Hilarious.
Remembering Nelson
Let's remember Nelson Mandela for all the home runs he hit and his fabulous centaur paintings.
The Arrested
I can only imagine they were planning the world's biggest cooling pie heist.